To Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You, Start By Forgiving Yourself

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If you’re feeling hurt or resentful toward someone, it’s easy to fall pray to the emotional pain.

You relive your worst moments over and over.

You want them to understand they hurt you. Even sometimes you want them to suffer as much as you are. And you’re actually holding your emotional pain.

Thoughts of guilt, shame, resentment, anger, and hatred represent slow, debilitating energies that will dis-empower you.

Forgiving others is essential for your spiritual growth. Yet it all starts by forgiving yourself.

It’s not about you

Whatever happened, happened. Don’t take it personally. Shift your mental energy to allowing yourself to be with whatever you’re feeling.

Don’t try to surpress your feelings. Feel them, without mentally travelling to the past.

Don’t blame others for your feelings. Don’t blame yourself either.

Forgiveness is not about the person you need to forgive. Forgiveness it’s all about taking care of you. I’ts about taking responsability for your own happiness.

Take distance from it

Pay attention to yourself when you’re having judgmental opinions.

When someone does something awful to you, take that person out of the equation and ask yourself:

Why did this happen?
How was I involved?
How can I grow from this?

Find compassion

Finding compassion for someone who did something very awful is painful. Even if you look at it from all perspectives, you think that person owes you an explanation, an apology.

There are cases you want to scream at them. You want to slap them. You want to make them suffer ( as you are suffering).

I know. It hurts.

But let me go straight to the point: If you wish to heal yourself, you should find compassion for whoever act poorly. Compassion is key to forgiveness.

If you look closely enough, you’ll see a little boy or girl who’s in pain or confused. They do the best they can to protect themselves.

Be kind instead of right

Most of times we don’t attach to people but stories. Stories we created and we feel they are real.

Most likely they are not.

Don’t expect others to tell you you’re right.

Your higher self doesn’t care a rap about what anybody else thinks or does.

When you are willing to freely send the higher, faster energies of love, peace, joy, forgiveness, and kindness as your response to whatever comes your way, you transform your energy. You do this for yourself.