To be tender is to accept the loved one’s weaknesses.
Philosopher Yann Dall’Aglio writes about love in the digital age. His two books, A Rolex at 50: Do you have the right to miss your life? and I love you: is love a has been? explore the challenges and triumphs in the modern era, where individualism and consumerism reign. His work is a declaration of his faith in love, a major feat for a skeptical philosopher.
The eternal problem of love: how to become and remain desirable?
The individual used to find an answer to this problem by submitting his life to community rules. You had a specific part to play according to your sex, your age, your social status, and you only had to play your part to be valued and loved by the whole community.
First, a process of rationalization of scientific research, which has accelerated technical progress. Next, a process of political democratization, which has fostered individual rights. And finally, a process of rationalization of economic production and of trade liberalization.
Now individuals are free to value or disvalue any attitude, any choice, any object. But as a result, they are themselves confronted with this same freedom that others have to value or disvalue them.
We only accumulate objects in order to communicate with other minds. We do it to make them love us, to seduce them.
How can we think of love in the years to come?
We can envision two hypotheses: The first one consists of betting that this process of narcissistic capitalization will intensify. We can also imagine a chemical treatment for breakupsthat weakens the feelings of attachment.