Emotional Wellness: Transforming Fear, Anger, and Jealousy into Creative Energy leads us to understand the roots of our emotions, to react to situations in a way that can teach us more about ourselves and others, and to respond to life’s inevitable ups and downs with far greater confidence and equilibrium.
What makes you jealous?
Possessiveness.
Jealousy itself is not the root. You love a woman, you love a man, and you want to possess the person just out of fear that perhaps tomorrow they may move with somebody else. The fear of tomorrow destroys your today, and it is a vicious circle.
So the first thing to remember is, don’t be bothered about tomorrows. Today is enough! Somebody loves you. Let this be a day of joy, a day of celebration.
A real love will be happy even if the partner feels joyous with somebody else
Someday the man you have loved, the woman you have loved, may find somebody else. It is simply human to be happy–but your woman is happy with somebody else. It does not make any difference whether she is happy with you or happy with somebody else, she is happy. And if you love her so much, how can you destroy her happiness?
Human beings are human beings. Once in a while everybody gets bored being with the same person all the time. Be factual; don’t live in fictions.
You only need human understanding, intelligence, and jealousy will disappear.
Giving freedom is a joy, having freedom is a joy
Jealousy is one of the most prevalent areas of psychological ignorance about yourself, about others, and more particularly about relationships. People think they know what love is; they do not know. And their misunderstanding about love creates jealousy.
By ‘love’ people mean a certain kind of monopoly, some possessiveness, without understanding a simple fact of life: that the moment you possess a living being you have killed that person.
But the thing has been going on a wrong path for centuries; it has become ingrained in us so much that we cannot separate love from jealousy. They have become almost one energy.
Idiots don’t want to change anything because any change means they will have to learn something again
The poets, the painters, the dancers, the musicians, the actors; you will find these people more loving, but their love is not focused on individuals. They are more loving, but to as many individuals as they come in contact with. They are the intelligent people, they represent our creative part.
You have known one woman, you know her nagging, you have become accustomed to it. Sometimes not only accustomed, you have become addicted, too. If suddenly your woman does not nag you, you will not be able to sleep that night–what happened? What has gone wrong?
If you drop comparing, jealousy disappears
We have been taught to compare, we have been conditioned to always compare. Somebody has a better house, somebody has a more beautiful body, somebody has more money, somebody else has a more charismatic personality. Compare, go on comparing yourself with everybody else you pass by, and a great jealousy will be the outcome. It is the by-product of the conditioning for comparison.
Comparison is a very foolish attitude, because each person is unique and incomparable.